Why Every Student Should Go Through the High School Application Process (even if they don't end up going!)
Now that I’ve been through the college application process (you read that right, college!) for my child, I’ve had time to reflect on what helped prepare them—not just academically, but socially and emotionally—for what was ahead.
Here’s something I’ve come to believe strongly:
Every student can benefit from going through the high school application process—even if they don’t ultimately attend a boarding or private high school.
Why? Because the process itself teaches foundational skills that most students don’t develop until they’re much older. And in today’s competitive world, learning these lessons earlier makes all the difference.
Let me explain.
1. It Helps Students Reflect on What Excites and Motivates Them
Middle schoolers rarely get asked:
“What do you really enjoy?”
“What activities light you up?”
“Where do you see yourself leading, contributing, or growing?”
But in the high school application process, they have to ask themselves these questions—and it’s incredibly clarifying.
Students begin to think:
What clubs or sports would I actually want to join?
Do I enjoy public speaking, math competitions, service learning?
What makes me feel confident? Curious? Challenged?
This early self-awareness becomes a compass they can follow—not just for high school, but well into college.
Even if they change directions later, the practice of self-reflection builds agency and purpose, instead of just coasting through the next four years.
2. It Strengthens Interview and Communication Skills
Let’s be honest—most 13- or 14-year-olds aren’t used to sitting across from an adult and talking about themselves. That’s not a bad thing—but it’s a skill worth learning.
The boarding school interview teaches students:
How to answer questions thoughtfully (not robotically)
How to engage in back-and-forth conversation
How to show presence through eye contact, posture, and tone
They begin to understand the subtle cues that shape how they are perceived—not just what they say, but how they say it.
These “soft skills” are often the differentiator in both high school and college interviews. They’re also life skills that carry over to internships, job interviews, presentations, and public speaking later on.
And the earlier they’re practiced, the more natural they become.
3. It Teaches the Importance of Building Meaningful Teacher Relationships
A major part of the application process is asking for teacher recommendations. And this is where an essential (but often overlooked) life lesson comes in:
Relationships matter.
When students know they’ll be asking for a letter of recommendation, they pay attention to how they’re showing up in the classroom. They’re more likely to:
Participate in discussions
Take feedback seriously
Stay after class to ask thoughtful questions
Be known as someone who cares
These behaviors not only make them stronger candidates—they make them more engaged students.
Even if they remain in their local school, they’ll carry this mindset forward. And by the time they get to college applications, they’ll already understand how to cultivate teacher relationships built on mutual respect and trust.
Final Thoughts: These Lessons Last Far Beyond High School
The truth is, the high school application process is a chance to get an inside glimpse —to build emotional intelligence, self-awareness, communication skills, and character.
Do students need to go to boarding school to succeed? Of course not.
But going through the process—whether they end up enrolling or not—can give them a head start on life skills that many students don’t learn until college or beyond.
And as a mom who’s walked this road three times, I can tell you: that head start makes all the difference.
✨ Have a question about the application process or interviews? Leave a comment or DM me on Instagram @boardingschoolmom. I might cover it in an upcoming post!